Hardly any middle ground: The UD dating culture phenomenon

Dating culture at the University of Dallas: where do I even begin? I hear mostly negative things about it, and as someone who experienced it during their entire freshman year, I can attest to the fact that UD dating culture is not an ideal one. Left and right, I have girl and guy friends giving up on finding a romantic partner at UD and looking at other schools such as SMU and UNT, going to popular Dallas bars and dance halls, or checking out the online dating scene on Hinge or Bumble. 

Two of my closest friends are in the best relationships of their lives, and surprise, surprise, their partners are not from UD. What’s more, I am also in the best relationship of my life, and my man does not go to UD, but graduated from A&M and is working to become a real estate billionaire. 

So, why is UD dating culture a failure? My hypothesis is because there is hardly any middle ground between traditional, religious partners and party-crazy partners. As a girl, I know UD guys get a bad reputation; but we need to acknowledge that a lot of the girls are contributing to the problem as well, especially those who pick a major that has few job opportunities, thinking it does not matter because they will find a guy to marry by senior year. 

These women do not even know themselves or the real world, which should be a major red flag to men. Some UD men are like this as well. Ladies and gentlemen, remember that while we are in college, we may not have experienced what it is like to be a fully-fledged adult; some of us still don’t know how to compare loan interest rates or establish payment plans. 

It seems best to experience the adult world yourself with taxes, bills, grocery shopping, rent, you name it, before you share that growth with someone else. A lot of UD couples rush into things they are not ready for, and if one is not properly prepared, marriage can actually worsen problems and insecurities instead of fixing them. 

Anyways, there is nothing wrong with being moderately traditional and devoutly religious, but some guys and girls take it way too far, and these are the ones that will beat themselves up if they do not get a ring by spring. These potential partners also are very socially awkward, have internalized misogyny because they have never been exposed to highly successful women, and constantly judge and patronize others for not being good enough. 

On the other hand, there is nothing bad about loving to party, as long as the partying doesn’t hurt you or others. It is all about balance, y’all. Also, drinking too much all the time makes your physical appearance unpleasant; the straight fact is that looks do matter in the dating scene. Again, some UD students take the partying too far all the time. These students are the ones who will lead  people on who they showed emotional or physical interest in, and then ghost them the next morning, only seek a partner when they are intoxicated or high, and have nicotine or alcohol addictions. 

None of these things are healthy; if a partner cannot take care of themselves and treat members of the opposite or same sex normally, they cannot take care of or treat you normally. Period. 

These observations come from my two and a half years of being at UD. These opinions being said, there are those who have achieved the middle ground, but they are few and far between, and most of them are taken. All of it comes down to each person’s individual lifestyle and preferences. Your call.