On Oct. 7, the Feast of Our Lady of the Rosary, I celebrated my 46th birthday (78th according to Fr. Joseph Paul Albin). Despite being born on the best day of the year (if I do say so myself), I’ve had an adversarial relationship with my birthday.–until this year.
To see the various students, staff and faculty wearing flannel or plaid shirts in homage to my less-than-inspired wardrobe, to receive so many greetings, to be the recipient of so much love; well, it was overwhelming in the best kind of way. It was also a moment of conversion for me, and as is often the case, conversion begot reflection.
The fruit of that reflection is this: there is something incredibly special about this place. It’s not perfect, for sure. I have a list of things I would love to see changed and there are days when these various issues frustrate me. The words of a beloved Canadian institution, Barenaked Ladies, come to mind: “If I had a million dollars…”
But, and this is a very important “but,” there is a something here that eclipses any issue or challenge. There is a reason why you are all here in this special place and I think it’s good to be reminded of this once in a while, as sometimes we can get caught up in the minutia. Sometimes we can fixate on some small attribute and it can start to become that which defines our experience of a thing.
I need that reminder myself sometimes and wiser folks than I have said that a defense against this is to focus on gratitude. So I beg your indulgence as I try to put this into practice and express some gratitude.
When I think of UD and what I am grateful for, what comes to mind first is the people, in particular, you the students. Despite my unworthiness, over the last two and a half years you have invited me into some of the most defining moments of your lives. You’ve allowed me to journey with you as you explore everything from the pain of grief and past trauma to the beauty that is hopes and dreams.
You’ve shared your struggles with the fundamentals (like your sexual identity or vocation) and with the mundane, yet so very exciting (like knowing when to ask the girl of your dreams to marry you). Highs, lows, successes, failures, you’ve shared it all and this has gifted me a privileged view of this community. What crosses my mind again and again is this: YOU ARE AMAZING.
Yes, you. Not the collective you, but each and every one of you. Some of you have heard me preach this before, but I will keep preaching it until it sinks in to every single one of you. So, if no one has told you this today, here it is again: You…are…AMAZING. And you have turned my ministry on its head.
When I accepted the job and made the 2000 mile trek from Cold Lake to Irving, I thought that I was coming to minister to you, that I was going to be the giver and you the receiver, that I would be some dispenser of wisdom and knowledge to the younger generation, and yet it is you, the students, who have been ministering to me.
You have inspired me: inspired me to learn more not only about our God, but also about the world, about literature, about politics, about history. I thought I would come here and help you navigate your separation from your families, help you adjust to truly exercising agency over your lives. And yet it is you who have ministered to my family, you who welcomed Anna, Aspen and I into your lives, baked cookies for us, prayed for us.
It was you who replaced our beloved statue of Mama Mary when she was stolen, it is you who keep a watchful eye on Aspen (remember, she isn’t allowed to date until she’s 35), it is you who gave me the most epic tuck-in ever, who join us in our home each week to break bread and bring us so much joy and laughter. It is you who have been Christ to my family over and over again.
So, while y’all are busy being Christ to me each and every day, indulge me for a moment longer and let me be Christ to you this time. Please read these words carefully: No matter where you are in your journey, know that I see you, my family sees you. No matter where you are in your journey, I want you to look into a mirror and repeat after me: You are smart, you are caring, you are important, you are funny, you are dedicated, you are tenacious, you are faithful, you are beautiful, you are loved. Yes, you are very much loved.
-Deac